I’m in month three of my Summer Art School and I have to say it’s not exactly going as I’d planned. To recap, my intention was to create my own curriculum for studying watercolor, drawing and design. I am doing this because I want to learn more technical skills about art. And because I want to have a structure to have art as a daily expression in my life. And because I want to slow down and be more mindful, and art making and being a student helps me do that. And because I want to have fun, and art has always been a joyful thing for me.
Plein Air Watercolor
But I’m finding watercolor class isn’t so much fun. I was warned that watercolor was a difficult medium, and alas, that’s true for me. Doing watercolor properly, that is. I have painted with watercolor for years now, and a giant painting I did in 1994 hangs on the wall of my parents’ home. But learning the ‘real rules’ isn’t so easy. I am called to really focus and pay attention. I am not easily grasping the concepts. I’ve realized that I need to actually focus my attention and think. It’s glaringly obvious that I don’t know what I am doing.
This is the challenge of being a student – the state of conscious incompetence. I have to set my ego aside and focus. For this part of my education, I can’t just throw something down on the page without thought. I need to be mindful of the paints I am mixing.
I can anticipate some of your responses to this. I hear you encouraging me to let go of doing it right and just do it. I think I hear that because that’s exactly what I would say to me in this situation. It’s not about doing it well, just do it. But I feel called to apply myself to something that isn’t easy for the sake of moving beyond my comfort zone.
The teacher moved the class to Golden for July, which means I take an hour-long bus instead of an energizing 40-minute bike ride. This will definitely challenge my commitment to the class, the class I am not really enjoying anyway. I trust that I will learn something, and that giving up isn’t really what I want. I can always read on the bus or listen to podcasts.
I can't complain about spending Tuesday mornings sitting creekside.
Drawing
On the drawing front, I am using Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain as a guide to becoming better at seeing and then drawing what I see. I love this book, and am amazed to see how much of my work as a coach of the creative process is explained by the concepts of left- and right-brained modalities. The exercises challenge me to slow down and pay attention. I am inclined to rush through everything, so this book is a great guide for me.
Mixed Media
I can’t set aside my love for mixed media projects like my City Shrines. I made a birthday shrine that embodies my intentions for myself for the next year of my life. I used a cigar box and lots of materials to clip and glue to the box.
I made my thank you cards from watercolor paper and stamps. It was a blast filling them with color and love and gratitude.
Like many things in life, the actual work is more difficult than the vision that brought me to the work. (Think parenting, marriage, business ownership!) But I am sticking with it.
More Mystery Than Ever
There’s so much more to this art thing than I can express. I am deep in the throes of discovering what this is about for me. It’s a handy distraction from waiting for Chasing Sylvia Beach to get a publishing deal. It’s a way for me to express and feel love. It’s a lifelong fascination with color and design. It is what it is and when I understand more about it, you’ll be the first to know.



Watercolors with rules. It is great to see that you are being with the discipline and what is it that really don't like about it? Can you really fail at it?
Enough coaching. I continue to be enthused by your passion to create and follow a heartpath and your dedication and gift to the rest of us to allow us to follow your JuJu journey. Oddly enough, I find that I get a little sad thinking of where I am now and what I might be experiencing if I gave myself permission to do the same thing you are doing. Now that I in the ranks of the unemployed, it might be the perfect time!
Namaste!
Posted by: Scott Baker | July 10, 2009 at 08:14 AM
Thanks, Scott. I love the word heartpath.
About the sadness, for my part, it seems that everything I do is accompanied by a range of emotions. No matter how hard I try to understand them, they remain elusive yet powerful. I'd focus on giving yourself permission to follow what pulls you to your heartpath. Being unemployed can clear distractions so you can focus inward. Enjoy it as much as you can and know that I believe in you.
Posted by: Cynthia Morris | July 20, 2009 at 10:35 AM